More hate, more love

I've figured out why the most seemingly dysfunctional of relationships tend to last longer than the calm ones. The reason is a working modification of "Tobago love". "Tobago love" for those of you who don't know is when people who like each other act like they dislike each other for some reason or the other. Mostly because they don't want everyone knowing that they like this person and the complications that may arise out of a Tobago love scenario such as the "picong" (chastisement) that may come from others or the awkward relationship that may come out of such love.

I call it a working modification of "Tobago love" because these people are in a relationship but they are always at each other's throats. They are indeed happy together but they never seem happy. It is always a battle with them but the relationship works. The reason why it works is simple. When a person aggravates another person the aggressor stays on their mind. This person and what they have done to you works its way into your being. The catch is that this person also (supposedly) cares about you and therefore you and your lover works it out. What is left in your being is only the person because persons in such dysfunctional relationships usually cannot hold grudges for long periods of time.



When a grudge holder is engaged in one of these relationships however things usually end badly. With activities from time immemorial coming to the forefront. Little inconsequential things that were long forgotten in the mind of the non grudge holder come back to haunt them but unfortunately they can do nothing about it as the only grudge that is held in this persons mind is probably their regret for hooking up with such a person. my advice on this is, like prison, avoid such relationships.