How it all comes tumbling down

I'm convinced that the root cause of all evil in this world is due to the fact that everyone is too guarded. Yes, I make yet another generalized statement over one incident that I have had. Here's to thanking God that I have my God given freedoms to do so.
I have been having problems with regards to communication with a close friend of mine and I sought to seek out the problem by having a talk with said person. I honestly believe though that if you ask someone to be polite before such a talk then you'll never get to the root of the matter. Alas, damn it hurts when you try to do the right thing.
This talk has led me to believe that people, in general, are very guarded. Especially when no warning is given as to the nature of the conversation. When I told my compatriot my perspective (i.e. the way I see things from the information that I have through my own experiences and interpretations) on our current situation I was then fed everything that was wrong with me and even chastised for trying to alleviate the situation. I am convinced (not that I consider myself too elite) that a lesser man would have lost his composure and at that point would have said "to hell with my outstretched hand to salvage an uncomfortable situation that we have found ourselves in which is certainly a euphemism for a much more crude term.
I would not deny that I retorted (still elite though) and I definitely did get my grouses across but i did tried to salvage what I could out of the situation. Amazingly though, when persons are faced with a situation that they can fully criticize the participants on the outside, they act just as predicted on the inside. No forgive and forget, no take the higher road and we'll talk and certainly no I can see your point of view, let me be sympathetic to your plight and work out our issues. All they see is, you are lying, wrong and I am not letting go of my perceptions of you because I have already been wronged by you and there is nothing more that i can say.
All I want to do, is get the word out to my friend (if they ever read this) is that, I see your point and I hope you see mine. We have found ourselves in an ugly situation and whilst things may never be as they were lets get our issues in the air and then get back to the point where we can still enjoy each other's company. Please understand that I must unload everything that I have before this can take place and if you have found a better way to deal with it other than thrashing it out i'll be willing to take a stab at your method.
Until then, ...